I’ve been knee-deep in my feelings over the past two months. Someone I really trusted hurt me in a cruel way. I have spent more time beating myself up for letting it happen than I have just accepting it and forgiving.
I forgave them.
As much for them as for me. Walking around stewing in anger and uncertainty is too much for the human soul. Then I realize that’s why she hurt me. She is in the middle of her own battle.
I looked over the course of my life and the romantic decisions that I have made and I saw where I have a history of settling for less than I deserve. I just keep taking and taking and taking and taking…. and taking.
Now, I’m spent and looking for the pedestal to place myself on because I deserve the time and attention I was giving to everyone else. This is scary. This is new. This keeps me up at night. But that proves how necessary it is, right?
I’ve never cried so much. Hopefully, these tears carry away old bits and pieces that were scarred and misunderstood. Hopefully this new air is loaded with the essentials necessary to be renewed.