Look who cares!! I don’t watch football, but I did see the Halftime show. I mean the HALFTIME show. I know that only upscale men with family take the time to watch the gentle nature of football while they enjoy a nice game of Yahtzee! with their family so I could understand why they would be upset about little Billy seeing the teat of the World renowned Ms. Jackson (if you’re naaaast-ay). But for the rest of us who actually live on earth and know that’s it’s football, I’m not buying it.

I believe she wanted the shock value, I don’t believe she intended to show the whole ta-ta on t-v. She has an album coming in March, doing a Halftime show that over 100 million people would be watching is more than enough exposure, she got greedy, she wanted to leave in imprint on the mind so when March rolls around she would still be fresh on the brain. She got more than she bargained for and paid the price.

Now here’s the clincher: there is no way in Hades new name that you could get me to believe that MTV had no prior knowledge. The only reason the stunt went as far as it did was because the outfit didn’t strip correctly. Meaning it was probably woven or tucked too tightly… Janet’s outfit was specially made, was it not? Funding had to be provided and a reason for additional funding had to be given by and to SOMEONE, did it not?

The excuse they are giving is that the little striptease was added after rehearsals (obviously) and it went awry. Aw-ful is more like it but not for ordinary reasons. Mtv expected backlash; what they didn’t expect was to be banned from producing another superbowl.

EXEC: Oh hell!! What?? You mean we can’t have our name attached to the biggest night in sports ever again? Well this just won’t do! Look Janet, I know we coerced you into doing this for the sake of being “MTv” but we need you to take the blame. That’s the only way Mr. Brown will let us back. You have an album coming out and we’ll give you all the free publicity you want, FOR LIFE. Just do this for us please please please pretty little silver nipple cover upper pleaasseee…

Running up hill fast as hell and blind as faith

I am in a fiesty mood today. Can anyone tell me who the Democratic candidates are? They all suck. I love being Black but Al and ol’ girl (I really dont even care what her name is) will not get my vote by playing the race card. And sad as it is to say, a white woman will be president far before a Black anything.

I was leaning towards Dean (and b leaning I mean standing still and facing in that direction) but then he jumped shipped. These candidates do nothing for me. Nothing!! At least with Al I could attempt to relate him to my boy Slick Willie but there is nothing in the house of Democrat and its a sad situation Dubya gets to do a repeat. SAD.

Why? First of all I am the first to say I am no expert on politics, now politiking is a ‘hole ‘nother subject, but politics I’m in the gray area. I believe George means well, but I also believe he’s slow as a box of rocks and someBODY is running this country sitting shotgun. I’m amazed.

I’m amazed we can spare 80 billion dollars in one year to rebuild and govern a country on the other side of the planet but we can’t afford to buy new books for schools. Yes, it is the same thing because in 15 years when those books are no longer relevant there will be a new war created that we will spend that inflated 800 billion on…

Yes, I said created war, and what? We were lead to believe that Saddam was an immediate threat and he needed to be stopped immediately. I’m two fold either that was the biggest horrible lie or the biggest best lie. It was a horrible lie if you moved this country in that direction because you needed to fulfill some testorione charge need to get redemption for 911 and the real culprits were making asses of you. More than usual of course. It was the best biggest lie if you used it as a diversionary tactic to keep all eyes on Saddam while you ripped spit from Osama. Now will we ever know which, oof course, everything done in the dark comes to light, look at Bob Dole, but I digress.

Look I relate everything through my 25 year old eyes and experiences and I have seen and done a lot more than most. The point is I take the time to actually listen and what I am hearing is that Bush will be president again and that depresses me.

Leave the Light On

I am known for shopping in the CD store. I can spend hours deliberating on what emotion could possibly exist under that beautifully difficult celophane wrapper. About five years ago while in the used CD section I came across an interesting find: it was an autographed copy of Screaming for my Supper. I didn’t know the artist and none of the songs sounded familiar but the fact that it was signed had me sold.

I took it home not expecting much, I figured if someone had an autographed copy and traded it in, it had to be awful, but I played it anyway. The first song started off slow but it moved me. It moved me enough not to miss my 6.00. I appreciated the songs for what they were although the first track is still my fav. A few years passed and I got Rhapsody service and one of the first artists I looked for was Beth Hart. I noticed she had another album, I figured why not. That’s when the love affair began. Her sound was sultry and bluesy and it touched me. Call it cosmic interference but I knew exactly what she meant when she screamed “am I the one?” She wasn’t just singing she was really expecting an answer. I feel like that is what good music is all about. She asks the question we hate to ask for fear of how we will be perceived. Blame the Moon It’s all the moons fault and her second album Immortal explains why.

Of course most artists beyond their time don’t get the appreciation they deserve, so just like the first two it was by chance that I happened upon her most recent release Leave the light on. On this Album Beth sounds like she is straddling the line between who she is and who she knows she should be (spiritually) and the reasons being the two are so hard.

Cause I wanna love
I wanna live
I don’t know much about it
I never did,
I don’t know what to do, can the damage be undone
I swore to God that I’d never be what I’ve become
Lucky stars and fairy tales
I’m gonna bathe myself in a wishin’ well
Pretty scars from cigarettes
I never will forget, I never will forget
I’m still afraid to be alone
wish that moon would follow me home
I leave the light on
I ain’t that bad I’m just messed up
I ain’t that sad but I’m sad enough
God bless the child with the dirty face who cuts her luck with a dirty ace
She leaves the light on, I leave that light on

This album offers much more to be admired. She hits the high notes on her third effort and stays true to everything she’s done so far. The questions are still there and her spirit is still fresh in every lyric. She is telling the stories we need to hear to remind us, we are not alone.

Music in itself is powerful. Its artists like Beth Hart that make stop, walk to the porch and leave the light on.

It’s True

Today I learned a new term. Ironic since it’s only six in the morning. I learned the term cognitive dissonance.

Main Entry: cognitive dissonance
Function: noun
: psychological conflict resulting from incongruous beliefs and attitudes held simultaneously

I didn’t know this problem existed until a year ago, maybe less than that. I definitely did not know it had a name, I just thought this person was a sole case. They often choose to be.

Why is it a problem? Let’s take homosexuality for example. First, understand I believe who you are attracted too is something you can not control. You can only control what you do about the attraction. Understanding that, imagine the frustration of loving someone and believing, sincerely, that loving that person is wrong.

Our beliefs are the foundations by which we live, love and grow. If those beliefs are strong enough, we began to punish ourselves, thinking its all for the greater purpose. This begins a spiral towards unease and abashment simply because you are conditioning yourself to discredit your own emotion. You could not ever be in a viable relationship without accepting who you are. In other words: How can you love someone else if you don’t love yourself?

I use Homosexuality as an example because I understand the question it presents in our society in relation to what we believe. I also understand there are people out there fighting against themselve because what they feel and what they believe are incongruous and that must be hell to deal with.

It is true that you do learn something everyday and sometimes – you already knew.